Reverse culture shock

I’m sometimes too arrogant to think I experience what “normal” people experience. I thought (stupidly) that I was “above” the typical bell-curve of cultural adjustment even though, in reality, I was a classic case study during most of my time in the Vo (and in India). Then I thought that by knowing that I’d experience some difficulty in re-adjustment, the process would be sped up and I’d be back to normal soon-sh.

Yet it’s there. It’s a fairly handy scapegoat (“I’m moody because I’m struggling with reverse culture shock. Please excuse me.”). At the same time, I wonder to what extent I can legitimately attribute my confusing emotional/social state to RCS. I read:
You may experience feelings of frustration, anger, alienation, loneliness, disorientation, and helplessness and not understand exactly why. You might quickly become irritated or critical of others and of U.S. culture. Depression, feeling like a stranger at home, and the longing to go back abroad are also not uncommon reactions. You may also feel less independent than you were while abroad.

Some of my examples are:

…feeling panicked every time I need to go grocery shopping: all of the choices and the (absurd) abundance of everything overwhelm me. Coffee shops and restaurants are equally intimidating, and I just want someone to order for me.
…realizing that I’m blanking out when people are talking to me – and not having a clue why.
…feeling more-than-normal social anxiety when in mixed gender settings. Yep, not used to having real conversations with gents.
…getting ridiculously high levels of frustration when I hear people refer to themselves as “poor college students” when everyone here is absolutely more privileged and with resources available to them. (um – that said, i’m something of a hypocrite on this one).
…feeling judgmental and overly-sensitive to what I perceive as wastefulness (garbage and spending), noise levels (I suppose I’ve always been sensitive about this – now even more), and the amount of resources that go to pets.
…being fine one minute (or week) and feeling like myself; then feeling like I’m from Mars and don’t have a clue what to do/how to respond in simple situations – and either lashing out or (what’s becoming more common) clamming up.
…not being able to keep up with the pace of spoken conversation. Man, it’s so fast sometimes! When did I become such a slow talker?
…going from being fairly outgoing and open to taking risks to feeling, for lack of a better word, careful/cautious. Am I withdrawing? Is this a part of me I wasn’t aware of? Or is it just part of readapting/readjusting?

Not everything is negative, of course. I am super-appreciative of the fall and local parks and community organization. I get really patriotic every time I bike past the public library or see how effective 4-way stop sign intersections are or jog on a lovely, cared for running path. When strangers help each other and give candy to neighborhood kids during Halloween and are uber-smiley with strangers on the sidewalk, I mutter “God bless America” under my breath. It’s good to be back in so many ways. I love where I am, I’m very grateful for this “sanctuary” season of my life, and I’m really enjoying the grad school experience.

But, especially the last little bit, I think I can safely assume that I’m experiencing RCS.