what goes up...

A few months ago, I was pretty flabbergasted at the capacity of a national friend of mine to hit such high peaks and low valleys...sometimes within a few hours. As I was walking (man...i really miss walking, dern foot), this refrain popped into mind: "And when she's up, she's up. And when she's down, she's down. And she's never halfway up - she's either up or down" (that's right - to the noble duke of york melody).


Sigh. That is so unfortunately and devastatingly and gahhhhh! me, too. I peak; I plummet. Sometimes my lack of "steadiness in temperament" makes me wonder if this line of work is okay for my constitution. Sometimes I get jealous of people who aren't constantly cycling between ecstasy and misery. Sometimes I wonder if this is a sign of my immaturity, if it's just a personality thing, or if it's due to an obvious imbalance of...something. ...or if I'm just being a smidge dramatic about the whole thing.

Four days ago, I was flying high. Teaching was going decently, I had some yummy conversations, and, as I wrote a letter home, I couldn't find words to express my love and appreciation for this place and the people around me. Now, "what was up...must come down" (to the tune of what goes up...must come down). Down, indeed. I am being punished by a 16-year-old guy via silent treatment. Another high school squirt, after saying some other hurtful and disappointing things, asked me, "Have you made any more big mistakes lately?" And my foot hurts, and I'm feeling behind in some stuff, and I'm feeling overwhelmed by some overwhelming needs, and I got stood up, and I got some disappointing news, and waaahh. (ew).

The thing is, there are some significant cheeries, too! (cheeries so significant that I'm not going to post them on a public blog!) (pause to think)...yep, there are some neat things as well. Ugh - at least "what goes down...will also eventually go back up." (only it doesn't fit the tune quite as nicely).